Sometimes, when a pregnant woman double-guesses her adoption decision, she asks herself: “Can I get my child back after adoption?”
If you find yourself asking this question, know that you’re not alone. It’s common for women considering adoption to doubt their choice because of the grief, loss and other confusing emotions they feel.
However, you need to know that you cannot get your child back after an adoption is finalized and completed. For the best interest of all involved, especially the adopted child, adoptions are rarely reversed in the state of North Carolina. So, if you’re having doubts about your adoption decision, you should not rely on your ability to take your child back if you change your mind.
That’s not to say that you don’t have certain adoption rights in North Carolina. In fact, North Carolina provides one of the longest revocation periods in the country — which allows you to take back your adoption consent within a certain time period after you sign away your parental rights. In North Carolina, you have the ability to revoke your adoption consent within seven days of giving it. To gain back your parental rights, you must work closely with your attorney and your adoption professional to follow the correct legal procedures, which involves giving written notice to the prospective adoptive parents.
If you change your mind again and give your consent to the adoptive parents a second time, there will be no revocation period, meaning your adoption decision will be final.
At A Child’s Hope, your adoption counselor and your adoption attorney will make sure you understand all of your adoption rights in North Carolina as a prospective birth mother — and, before you sign any sort of adoption consent, that you understand exactly what this decision means. If you have questions about your adoption rights, you can always talk to an adoption counselor atour Pregnancy Hotline: (919) 971-4396, or Text: Pregnant to (919) 971-4396, or email ach@achildshope.com.
How the Adoption Consent Process Works
When you’re a pregnant woman considering adoption, remember that you always have the right to change your mind about your adoption decision any time before you sign your consent to adoption. This means that even after you have matched with an adoptive family and given birth to your baby, you can still decide that parenting is your right decision.
In North Carolina, once your child is born, you do not have to wait a certain amount of time before giving your adoption consent. Whenever you decide you are ready to sign your adoption consent paperwork, here’s what the process will generally look like:
- Your adoption counselor and/or adoption lawyer will meet you at the hospital.
- They will explain to you your adoption rights, including the fact that you cannot get a child back after adoption.
- After you fully understand the legal consequences of your adoption consent, you will sign your adoption paperwork. You will have seven days to revoke this consent. A Child’s Hope will transfer custody of your baby to the adoptive parents and make sure their adoption is completed safely.
After seven days have passed and you do not revoke your consent, you will have no more parental rights to your child. However, if you think your consent was given under fraud or duress and you wish to get your baby back after adoption, it’s best to contact your adoption lawyer to see what options are available to you.
If you’re preparing to sign your adoption consent and wondering, “Can I get my baby back after adoption?” it may mean you’re not ready to make your adoption decision — and that’s perfectly okay. Your adoption counselor will be available to discuss your emotions and help you decide what’s best for you and your baby at this point in your decision process. In addition, if you think you want to revoke your adoption consent, your counselor will help you determine whether your feelings are normal expressions of grief after an adoption or really mean that adoption is not the right choice for you.
Your Birth Mother Adoption Rights in North Carolina
In addition to the right to change your mind at any point in the adoption process, you will have several other adoption rights as a prospective birth mother. Remember, you will be in charge of your adoption process from the beginning to end, so you will be able to decide what you’re comfortable with and change your preferences if you need to.
When you work with A Child’s Hope to complete your adoption, we will respect all of your rights in the adoption process, including your:
- Right to create your own adoption plan, including a plan for your hospital stay
- Right to choose the perfect adoptive family for your baby
- Right to free adoption counseling and legal services
- Right to create an open adoption communication contract that you’re comfortable with
If you choose an open adoption in North Carolina, your adoption counselor will help mediate any contact between you and the adoptive family, if necessary. While open adoption is not legally enforceable in North Carolina, we will work to protect your birth mother rights in open adoption by reminding the adoptive family of their communication commitment, if necessary. You will still have no parental rights after you give a baby up for adoption, but A Child’s Hope will strive to make your open adoption as positive an experience as possible.
Remember, your adoption process and what you’re comfortable with will be entirely up to you. Your adoption counselor will work with you every step of the way so you’re aware of your adoption rights and you make the decisions that are best for you and your baby.
Final Thoughts
There’s no denying that adoption can be a difficult process, but you should never be forced into a decision you’re not ready to make. If you’re having doubts about whether adoption is right for you, especially if you’re thinking about getting your baby back after adoption, we encourage you to talk to our adoption specialists for free immediate counseling and assistance call our Pregnancy Hotline: (919) 971-4396, or Text: Pregnant to (919) 971-4396, or email ach@achildshope.com. At A Child’s Hope, we will always respect your adoption rights as a prospective birth mother and make sure you receive all the adoption support you need to make the best decision for you and your baby, whatever it is.
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Kelly Dunbar
Adoption Counselor/Homestudy Supervisor - Triangle
As an adoptive parent I truly have a passion for adoption. There is no greater joy than helping to create a family! I love this job and I love working with adoptive parents as well as the birth parents. When it all comes together it is an awesome experience! Kelly is a graduate of NC State University where she earned a Bachelor of Social Work. She also received her Master of Social Work from the University of South Carolina. Kelly has been working with children, families, in the home and in communities for 18 years. Kelly has been working with birth mothers and adoptive parents for the last 5 years. Besides working, she has a great husband and three fabulous children, Landon, Parker and Ansley. Kelly and her husband adopted their daughter with the help of ACH and feels as though her personal experience helps her relate to other adoptive families.
Sloane Mosley
Greensboro
Sloane completed her undergraduate degree in Human Services Counseling at Old Dominion University and holds a Master's Degree in Social Work from the University of Southern California. Sloane has been working with children, birth mothers and adopting families for more than 10 years. She loves advocating for children and helping women during pregnancy.
Lakisha Brown
Winston-Salem
Lakisha completed her undergraduate degree in Sociology with a concentration in Social Welfare at Winston-Salem State University. She received her Master of Social Work from Syracuse University. Lakisha has worked with children, individuals and families for more than 12 years. Her experience includes working with at-risk youth, homeless children and families, child mental health, as well as school social work and case management. She is also a long-time basketball fan, a former player and coach. She played at Winston-Salem State University and coached women’s basketball at Elon University and Syracuse University. Lakisha and her husband reside in Alamance County, with their young son.
Jessica Otolinsky
Asheville
Jess completed her undergraduate degree in Communication at the University of Pittsburgh at Johnstown and earned her Master of Arts degree in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Messiah College. Her professional experience includes case management, education, women’s behavioral health including a focus on pregnant mothers, and working with kinship and domestic adoptive families who have experienced trauma. Jess is a native of central Pennsylvania though loves living in Asheville with her significant other. When she is not working, she is likely caring for her puppy and dog, painting, practicing yoga, camping or planning her next road trip to see family and friends or have an adventure in some new place!
Sylvia Senbel
Charlotte
Sylvia is a graduate of Western Carolina University, where she earned a Bachelor of Social Work. She also received her Master of Social Work from the University of North Carolina. Sylvia has been working with children and families for more than 19 years. She enjoys gardening, reading, hiking, and spending time with her husband and three boys. She also loves animals, especially her dog Jazzy.
Nicole Barnes
Jacksonville
Nicole completed her undergraduate studies at Chowan University in Psychology with a concentration in Alcohol & Drug Studies and a minor in Criminal Justice. Nicole has provided services to adolescents, teens, college students, the Department of Corrections, the Department of Parole and Probation, the NC Division of Motor Vehicles, the Division of Transportation, and the Department of Defense. She is a Certified Alcohol & Drug Counselor and has been working in the mental health field for 15 years.
Suzanne Mangum
Triangle
Suzanne was the primary pregnancy care manager stationed at Duke high-risk perinatal clinic for 20 years. She has a BS in Social Work at UNC Pembroke and is a licensed School Social Worker. She recently worked as a case manager in a substance abuse disorder residential program for women with young children. Suzanne is a “Durhamite” but has resided in Wake County since graduating. Her biggest accomplishment has been happily raising her 14 yo daughter and 3 poodle mixed pups.
Hope Brown
Triangle
Hope completed her undergraduate degree in Social Work at North Carolina Central University. She has worked with children and families for more than 20 years. Hope experience includes working in foster care, CPS as well as a school social worker. Hope loves exercising, football and spending time with her family. Hope resides in Durham County with her son, daughter and her dog Penny.
