It’s a natural reaction to an unplanned pregnancy: “I don’t want to be pregnant,” or even “I don’t want my baby.”
If you don’t want to be pregnant or feel that you aren’t ready to be a parent, you do have options.
As a woman facing an unplanned pregnancy, you are the only person who knows what is right for you and your baby. No one — not your parents, friends, the baby’s father or your adoption counselor — can tell you what to think or how to feel about abortion vs. adoption.
When you contact A Child’s Hope, your adoption counselor will discuss your options with you and help you make the choice that is best for yourself and your baby. We have locations locally throughout North Carolina from Charlotte to Asheville to Raleigh and the Triad. We have worked with hundreds of women in situations like yours, and we have information that may help you make a more informed decision. As you make one of the most important decisions of your life, we believe that you deserve to have all of the facts.
Before making a hasty decision, here’s what you need to know about abortion vs. adoption:
- The costs of abortion and adoption vary. Adoption is always 100 percent free to you. All of your legal, medical, counseling and other adoption-related costs will be paid for you, and you can also receive additional financial assistance to cover living expenses like housing, clothing and groceries during and after your pregnancy. In contrast, abortion can cost as much as $2,000 or more if there are complications requiring additional medical care.
- The timing of your decision matters. Adoption is always an option, and you can begin the adoption process as early or as late in your pregnancy as you like. It is never too late to consider adoption, even if your baby has already been born. This gives you plenty of time to think about your adoption decision and to make an adoption plan that you are comfortable with. On the other hand, abortions are typically performed during the first trimester of pregnancy, and waiting to make your abortion decision can lead to increased medical risks and complications.
- You may or may not be able to change your mind. You are always in control of your adoption plan, and that means you can legally change your mind about your adoption decision at any time during the process. Your adoption decision is not permanent until you legally consent to the adoption after your baby is born. In North Carolina, a birth mother has seven days after she signs consents to revoke her consent. However, abortion cannot be undone. Once you have started the medical abortion process, your abortion decision is final and permanent.
- Your decision will have a lifelong impact. Neither of your options is easy, and both can have lasting emotional effects. But with adoption, you have the option to maintain a lifelong relationship with your child; if you choose an open or semi-open adoption, you will always know that your child is happy and thriving. Knowing that you will receive pictures and letters or visit with your child may give you the peace of mind you need to grieve in a healthy way. Our counselors work with you to help you anticipate the grief and prepare for it. With abortion, you do not have the option to know your child or maintain a relationship with your child. For some women, it is difficult to come to terms with this decision, and they may struggle with difficult feelings of grief, regret and depression long after their pregnancy is terminated.
There are many factors to consider when choosing abortion or adoption, but the most important are your personal circumstances and beliefs. Every woman’s situation is different, and you are the only person who can choose adoption instead of abortion or vice versa.
However, you do not need to make this decision on your own. Our adoption counselors are highly qualified and licensed to provide the emotional support and information you need as you consider your options.
If you are pregnant but don’t want to parent your baby, you can call us, text us, or fill out our online contact form any time. One of our adoption counselors will reach out to you with free, confidential no-obligation information about the adoption process, our services, and the choices you have when you make an adoption plan for your baby.
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