Positive Adoption Language
Talking to Your Child About Open Adoption: Using Positive Language
The use of positive language helps to normalize and reinforce the concept that adoption is simply one way of building a family. When speaking with your child about adoption, it is very important to utilize appropriate words and phrases, which can help provide comfort and encouragement. In speaking with others, it is also very helpful for you to model the use of positive adoption language, in place of some of the “traditional” terminology associated with adoption.
Below are examples of positive words and phrases to utilize when speaking with your child or others about adoption:
| Positive Language | Traditional Language |
| Birth parent | Real parent |
| Biological parent | Natural parent |
| Birth child | Own child |
| Parent | Adoptive parent |
| Our child | Adopted child |
| Was adopted | Is adopted |
| Born to unmarried parents | Illegitimate |
| Placed for adoption | Given up/Given away |
| Chose adoption | Couldn’t keep |
| An unplanned pregnancy | An unwanted child |
| Has special needs | Handicapped child |